My Journal: Pregnancy 6, Loss 5, Day 1

The strange thing about getting a positive test after multiple losses, is that you actually don't equate it with a baby anymore. Ryan slept in late, which turned out to be a blessing. I had promised my nurse that I would take a pregnancy test this morning to rule out pregnancy as the reason for

To Sam & Nia: On miscarrying and grieving in the public eye from someone who knows

Photo Credit: Sam & Nia/YouTube Dear Nia and Sam, When your first video went viral, I couldn't watch it. I didn't want to watch it. I thought it was sweet, and maybe interesting (how did he get your pee??), but something held me back. You see, I've had 4 miscarriages. (Well, one was ectopic. But

On your should-have-been birthday

Hey there baby Olivia. You're not so baby anymore, you know that? You were due to arrive safely in my arms three years ago today. Well, at least that was the plan. You know how plans go. And you definitely know how this plan went. Looking back, I can't believe how much I've changed in

To the unsung heroes of Father’s Day

To the unsung heroes of Father's Day´╗┐ I wonder if this is how pastors feel delivering a sermon for Mother's Day. After all, they aren't moms themselves. But they have to somehow encourage moms, and speak as though they get it. Likewise, I've never been a bereaved father. But I feel it's really important to

A heart suspended

My beautiful friend Bethany, and her momma, after the delivery of her stillborn baby Mya. This photo says it all. Birds chirp outside on this beautiful Sunday morning. I am sipping my sugared espresso my husband crafted for me, with foamed up half and half (and a scoop of hand-whipped cream for good measure.) Katie