When my husband Jordan and I decided to have children, I never thought it
would lead to what it did.
In July, 2009 I found out I was expecting. You can imagine we were completely overcome with joy.
All I could think of was, “Wow that was quick but I am ready!”
Three weeks later, a day after our anniversary, I woke up to the fact that I was losing my first child. I mourned the loss, but knew immediately I wanted to try again.
Luckily, two months later, I became pregnant again.
We put off celebration until we heard the heartbeat. At seven weeks we went in and there was the most beautiful sound I have ever heard: my baby’s heartbeat. W never had another problem and I gave birth to a beautiful and healthy baby girl.
Our plan was to wait a couple of years to have another child. In 2012, when our first sweet girl was 18 months old, we found out my birth control had failed and we were expecting. Only two short days later, I lost my second child. Since we weren’t planning on having a child right away, we decided to wait a few months to try again.
In April 2012, I found out I was expecting again. We were so excited. But unfortunately I lost my third child at seven weeks gestation.
I was willing to not give up at this point and give it one more try.
Four weeks later, much to the surprise of everyone, including my doctors, I was pregnant again. They watched me very closely. At seven weeks, I heard the sweet sound of my baby’s heartbeat. So I breathed a sigh of relief and we started telling our families and celebrating the arrival of our second child.
But the worst day of my life came shortly after when I was 11 weeks.
I walked in to my doctor’s appointment, and there was no longer a heartbeat. I have never been so sad in all of my life. I had just lost my fourth child. We immediately went to the hospital for my first D&C; all the others I passed naturally.
At this point I was done trying. I had a healthy little girl and I couldn’t handle the thought of losing a baby again. But God had other plans.
On October 31, 2012, it was confirmed that I was pregnant yet again. There wasn’t instant happiness because I was terrified. But I put my trust in God and he saw me through. I never was at ease through the whole pregnancy but we made it. In June of 2013 our second beautiful and healthy baby girl was born.
My only hope in all of this is that perhaps I can help someone else through their own loss one day.
Samantha, thank you so much for sharing. I think, today, you have helped someone else.