My Journal: Pregnancy 6, Loss 5, Day 1

The strange thing about getting a positive test after multiple losses, is that you actually don't equate it with a baby anymore. Ryan slept in late, which turned out to be a blessing. I had promised my nurse that I would take a pregnancy test this morning to rule out pregnancy as the reason for

I lost the baby

    Just so you know, this post might not be for you. It's not going to be fun. Or fit altogether in this nice, neat little package that makes you feel good inside. Because right now, nothing in my life feels nice or neat. I either feel totally numb and empty -- or so